Dive deep into three powerful questions that change your life. If you’re feeling overwhelmed, stressed, or disconnected from your true self, this episode is for you.

💫 Discover how to manage your energy, reclaim your power, and create a life filled with vibrancy and fulfillment.

💫 Explore the impact of external validation, societal conditioning, and the patriarchal system on our self-worth and ability to manifest our desires.

💫 Learn practical tips for navigating negative thoughts, setting boundaries, and choosing actions that align with your desired feelings.

Join us as we guide you through the process of asking yourself: How do I want to feel? What will help me feel that way? Did it help me feel that way? These questions unlock profound insights into your emotional well-being and empower you to make aligned choices for a life you love.

This episode offers valuable tools and perspectives to help you on your journey.

Click play now to embark on a path of self-discovery, emotional mastery, and creating a life that resonates with your true essence.

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Download the Charmed Morning Ritual Worksheet to help you apply the 3 powerful questions that change your life: https://www.threecharmedgems.com/charmed-morning-ritual-opt-in/

Want to take this work deeper and apply it to your life?  Book your complimentary Discovery Call here: https://www.threecharmedgems.com/calendar

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Welcome to the Crystal Self Healer Podcast. I’m Corissa Weaver. On this podcast, we blend the magic of crystals with the science of psychology to help you break free from chaos, ditch the overwhelm, and master your emotions so you can have more energy, get more done, and feel better every day. Get ready to unlock your intuition and restore your true power as we cover how you can transform your life using crystals and self awareness.

Are you ready to get started? All right, let’s go.

By now, if you’ve been following along on this Crystal Self Healer journey, you’re coming to realize that the trick to creating a life that is vibrant, fun, fulfilling, as well as free from stress, overwhelm, and chaos comes in large part from how you choose to direct your energy, manage your energy, and then show up in full embodiment for and of that life.

So many of us are wrapped up in the pressures and stresses of our day to day lives, that we are detached from how simple it can be to create the life we want. We get bogged down in the minutia, we become overwhelmed with the noise, we bend to the pressure, and then lose our way as a result.

I’m here to help you find your way, to be the light that helps you find your path again, so that you can reclaim your power, your strength, your passion, your worth. And in this episode, we’re going to cover the three powerful questions that change your life.

I want for us to take a step back and to understand how it is we got here, to this place where we deem ourselves not good enough, or not lovable, or not worthy, or not capable of creating and realizing the desires and goals we have. Quite simply, we have been conditioned to look outside of ourselves for validation, for confirmation, for acceptance, for permission. This is definitely a symptom of the patriarchal system we live in. Where we look to laws that are meant to make other people behave a certain way in order for us to feel safe. Where we look to institutions, religious and educational, to teach and show us what we should know and then be measured up against whether we perform according to their standards. And as women, there has been a systemic push to minimize the value of our contributions, a push to limit the roles we hold, a push to pigeon hole or force conformity to the rules and expectations of the institutions so that the power structure as it is today can remain in a place of power.

We aren’t here today to outwardly take down the patriarchy, but we are here to remove whatever shackles you are wrestling with so you can embody the person you crave to be.

And the bonus to doing this work is that the assumed power of the patriarchy can’t hold you down when you are living your life, according to your own rules.

I find that doing this practice regularly, daily, is the best way to start dismantling all the habitual thoughts and beliefs that create this dynamic.

You can use the charmed morning ritual worksheet as your template to work through these questions. If you haven’t already downloaded this worksheet, the link is in the show notes.

To get started with the three questions that change your life, I want you to start by asking. How do I want to feel? There are so many good words we can use here. Powerful resourceful, resilient, loved, happy, purposeful. The list goes on.

I want to impart a nugget that happened to be a huge revelation for me when I was deep in the weeds of my healing. No one can make you feel anything. For the most part, our feelings are the result of our thoughts.

As empaths and sensitives when we are disconnected from us, our sense of wholeness, we really struggle to know our energetic and emotional boundaries. We can find ourselves at the mercy of sensing things that come from outside of us. But there is a distinct difference between us sensing things from outside ourselves and us having feelings. For someone to trigger us to feel bad about something, we have to agree with that statement.

A big part of the work we need to do as empaths and sensitives is to truly understand the difference between what we sense from outside of us to what we are thinking and believing. And I think so many of us are so wrapped up in our everyday lives, that we forget that we have the ability to choose what we think. The ability to choose where we place our attention. This was true for me before I decided to get serious about my emotional wellbeing.

And truthfully, I still have days when it feels like the pit of negative thoughts is deep and insurmountable, but that’s usually when I’m tired and need a good nap. I talk a lot about grounded awareness. Knowing what’s going on in your life, in your mind, what your triggers are, how they set off the domino effect of your thoughts and emotions. This ability to be an observer of what is going on in your brain, in your day, will serve you in course correcting throughout the day, as well as in addressing those underlying wounds that keep coming up for healing.

When you’re asking yourself, how do I want to feel?,

You get to try on these feelings kind of like trying on hats to see which one suits you best in that moment for that day. And when you land on the one feeling that you desire, that’s the one you go with. You can do this with different feelings throughout the day, or project by project, but when you’re starting out on this journey, it can be overwhelming to flip around that much.

So once you’ve landed on the way you want to feel, you then get to do some brainstorming by asking yourself the next question. What will help me feel that way.

For me when I was living my darkest days, the thing that helped me feel how I wanted to feel was when I was engaging in and creating rituals with crystals and other metaphysical tools. But truly this can be anything. It’s important to have items that are things within your control. For example, if your desired feeling is to be calm or peaceful and the thing that will help you feel that way is for your partner to stop chewing their gum loudly. You are not setting yourself up for success here. Yes. You can have a conversation with them. And maybe they will try to accommodate your request. But as humans, we have the tendency to slide back into old habits and behaviors.

There were so many times when I was figuring out how to do this step effectively, that I would ask people around me to do something in order to help me feel better. And these requests were usually innocuous, like picking up after yourself, or putting dishes in the sink. You know, simple, regular things. But the clashes that came from these simple requests, and then the spiral of negative thoughts and emotions I experienced afterwards. Was often worse than the original feeling.

The spinoff negative loop was also the questioning of how committed my partner was to me, our relationship, and my getting better. I would be thinking things like he must not care enough, not love me enough, or that it meant I was not respected. Anyway, try to keep your list of things that will help you feel your desired feeling within your control and not dependent on someone else, their actions and behaviors.

These can be things that you do, like me and the crystal rituals, or it can be the practice of bringing your attention to when you’re not aligning with or feeling the way you want to feel. Or anything in between. This is the step that helps you take the aligned action toward feeling the way you want to feel, achieving the end result you’ve chosen for yourself.

When you have your list of things you can do to help you feel the way you want to feel, you then go try them. You get to go see which one of these things you could do will actually bring about the shift, the change, the feeling you want. You could start by doing all the things, every single one on your list, but this could end up being more overwhelming or confusing than necessary. There is something to be said about practicing constraint and being measured in your approach and that is so that you can work through the third question of, Did it help me feel that way? This is when you get to observe and reflect on the changes or shifts you’ve made and objectively measure them against the result you desire. If the thing did help you feel your desired feeling you then know you can keep doing that thing. If it didn’t, you can then decide if you want to adjust the thing, or discard the thing. So let’s again use the example of wanting to feel calm and peaceful. And you’ve identified the absence of hearing gum chewing as something that will help you feel better. So when you notice your partner pops some gum in their mouth, you decide to leave the room and do something else where you can’t hear the gum chewing. You would be able to measure whether this action worked or not.

Truthfully, there is usually a whole lot more going on in this type of situation with many nuanced side issues. But I used this example to show you that there are multiple ways to address a situation. Some productive, some not, some that make some difference, but not all the difference. There are lots of side benefits and incremental gains that we may experience and this question is best answered when you are open to recognizing your progress, as well as overall accomplishment. So you may need to cast your net wide for how what you’ve done is helping you go in the direction of your desired feeling. And then be creative in how you can troubleshoot and adjust what you did do to achieve better results as you continue to improve on what you did, or try new things.

In episode 17, we talked about how our ability to hold our focus and our energetic vibration in alignment with our desires for longer and longer amounts of time is how we activate the law of attraction to bring our desired result into our reality. When you don’t hold belief in yourself, or you doubt, or you live in fear, you won’t always experience the results of your efforts immediately. And when you do the practice of asking yourself these three questions and coming back to what you want, what you can do, and whether it garnered the desired result you will undoubtedly see results. So I hear you saying: But how do you handle when you get an opposite result or a bad result? First. Let’s remind ourselves that there is no wrong decision and no wrong choice. Everything we do and experience helps us grow and learn on our path. Everything you try gives you data. Information that helps you improve, change, shift. It’s an opportunity for you to connect with how you are a co-creator of your reality, and that you have the power to make big and little shifts that help you stay in alignment emotionally and energetically with who you want to be and how you want to feel on a daily basis. And how you carry out those changes and shifts is entirely up to you and within your control.

Today’s episode has been brought to you by morning rituals and powerful questions. May we all fearlessly claim how we want to feel so we can cut through the noise of our negative thoughts to create lives we love. Blessed be, my friends.

All right, my friends, that wraps up this week’s episode. Thank you for joining me here today on the Crystal Self Healer Podcast. If you haven’t already, hit subscribe, leave a review, and take the What Crystal is Best for You quiz linked in the show notes. Join me again next week as we continue to demystify crystals, how your brain works, and how you can use them so you can have more energy, get more done, and feel better every day.